Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Doubting Myself

Today I feel like I'm going to be the worst mom ever.

I let the 11 month old that I watch get hurt today. The gas fireplace was on, I

forgot about it, got distracted cleaning up lunch, and he touched the glass and
burned his hands.

He cried for a hour before falling asleep. He seemed 'okay' (and by that I mean he didn't cry) when he woke up. He was looking at his hands a lot and recoiled when he tried to crawl, but he ate a bottle and was smiling at his sister.

His dad was on the opposite side of the state somewhere 3+ hours a way, and I didn't have a number for him. The mom was in meetings (I have no idea at which office) and didn't get my message until 5pm. Looking back I should have looked up the number in the phone book and started calling the offices. Maybe I should have just taken him to the ER.

They are in the process of moving and things are all packed up and all over so I could only find the baby lotion and I put some of that on his hands

When she (the mom) did get the message she called the doctors after hours and had me talk to the nurse so I could tell her about the blisters since the mom wasn't home.

When the mom did get home and saw them (one hand has blisters on the finger tips, the other on the palm) she started crying because she felt bad for him which of course made me cry because it was my fault for not watching him close enough.

The mom knows how he is into everything and knows that I didn't do it on purpose, but it doesn't make me feel better.

I cried when I got into the car to go home because I just feel like if I can't keep a kid safe from 8-5:30 how am I going to keep my own safe all the time.

I cried to Rob when he got home because of my fears and he tried to make me feel better but I don't. I calmed down after a while and stopped crying.

His mom just called to let me know they are leaving the ER. They think they are 2nd degree burns. The doctors put some stuff on it and said in a few days the blisters should pop. They are going to a burn specialist tomorrow just because he's so young and they want to make sure their is no lasting damage.

So while it looks like he will be okay, I still feel horrible (as if you couldn't tell already). And yes, I did cry again when I got off the phone with the mom.

1 comment:

  1. This was burn week apparently. My son got a GIANT burn, blisters and everything on his leg. It was dadda who will not win father of the year for that one; long story but it was his idea to boil the water that they were using for their project. Hope the kiddo you watch is ok. i inderstand all the crying! You have to go with the attitude I am; no broken bones, and not blind or deaf. Could be worse!